How a scarf is helping keep the memory of a Hillsburgh woman alive

HILLSBURGH – Kelly O'Callaghan's heart sank when she drove past the Northern Dancer horse statue outside the Hillsburgh Community Christian Church last weekend and noticed its scarf was missing. 

A distinct red-and-blue plaid pattern, the scarf belonged to Kelly's daughter, Laura, and has been wrapped around the statue's neck every winter since she passed away in 2019. 

In the six years they've put the scarf on the horse, it's never gone missing. 

"I didn't want to be dramatic but it was pretty painful (when I noticed the scarf wasn't there)," said Kelly. "The scarf represents Laura to us, right? So when the scarf was gone, it was a shock." 

Coming from a "horsey family," Kelly said Laura always loved horses and this horse statue in particular, joking she most likely sat on it at least once in between her competitions at the Caledon Pony Club. 

"When the right thing comes to you, you know it, you feel it," said Kelly. "That's the feeling I had with the scarf on the horse. It was like this is a small thing but it's the right thing."

Using the tradition as a "way of remembering," Kelly said she believes the first time the horse sported the scarf was the December after Laura passed away. The family typically puts Laura's scarf on the horse in the winter and removes it after daylight saving time in March. 

"It's just a small thing. I think all parents who lose a child do small things to remember them," said Kelly. "It's just some kind've memorial, not just for us but for her community that knew her."

When Laura's scarf went missing, Kelly turned to Facebook, posting in multiple groups in the hopes someone might see the story behind the scarf and bring it back.

Unbeknownst to her, Kelly's daughter, who gifted Laura the scarf, even taped a sign on the horse, talking about its sentimental value and asking for its return. 

Two days later, Laura's scarf was returned.

The culprit? A member of the Century Church Theatre, who was just trying to help. A quick wash later and Kelly said the scarf is now safe at home and ready for another winter. 

Commenting on the positive response she received during the search, Kelly said it was nice to see Facebook used "as it's supposed to" as opposed to seeing people be negative about the community. 

"It felt very supportive," said Kelly. "A lot of people know us and know what we've been through and I'm sure they felt as sad as we did to see the scarf go missing." 

Outside of the scarf, Kelly said she's always looking for new ways to remember Laura, saying she was funny with a ton of personality and had a "way of lighting up a room." 

"She was just starting her life and just coming into herself, it was wonderful," said Kelly. "That's how I want people to remember her: full of love, full of life. A lot of people enjoyed her company." 

Looking forward to this winter, Kelly said she's definitely planning on continuing the tradition this winter and for winters to come. The family said it would also love to dedicate a bench outside of the Hillsburgh Library or create a scholarship for budding journalists in Laura's memory. 

"It's a bit of an inside story. Her friends know it's her scarf, our friends know it's her scarf but now more people will know so that's why we do it," said Kelly. "We don't want her to be forgotten." 

Isabel Buckmaster is the Local Journalism Initiative reporter for GuelphToday. LJI is a federally-funded program.